To Be Important To You

Ever since I can remember
I've been a stickler for punctuality

Being on time for school was
Always a priority
And if my ride for school
Wasn't on time, I'd begin walking

The feeling of frustration when
I can't be on time or
Someone else isn't on time
Is overwhelming

I been trying to resolve
This neurotic pet-peeve of mine
FOR YEARS

Mainly because it's ordinary for
People and events to be late,
And because there's really
Nothing wrong with being late

The only wrong thing I can muster
Is a possible threat to
The sense of integrity:
Actions not aligning with words;
Words not aligning with feelings;
And feelings not aligning with thoughts

Thus far in my quest to
Discover the foundation of my
Distress with lateness has
Led me to the following
Unraveling of thought pattern

When someone is late my thought is:
4. Why can I be on time but you can't?
3. Why isn't it important to keep your word?
2. Why am I not important to you?
1. I'm not importnat

No. 4 and 3 are anger
No. 2 is fear
No. 1 is pain

Certainly No.1 is the culprit

No.1 Is the reason for the
Hell I’ve created for myself
When someone I want
To be important to is
Several minutes late

No. 1 is actually quite innocent
“I want to be important to
Someone who is important to me”

Unbelievable how
Basic-unmet-needs
Can turn into painful
Life dramas