Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Self-Defeat

I had a small conversation
With a friend yesterday and she was
Trying to explain to me that once



You’re aware of a self-defeating behavior
In yourself then you’re cured of it

I, of course, had an opinion about it

She was saying that once you’re aware
Of the behavior then you can choose
To continue to practice it or not

So in other words the behavior is 
No longer an automatic response

Instead it now requires consciousness,
Choice, and desire to practice

And I agree that all of this can hold true but there’s
A missing link that I’m trying to resolve

It’s almost like the person who is addicted
To food and cannot stop eating though
They’re 300lbs overweight, and chronically ill

Food is used to soothe something in the person’s
Psychology that he hasn’t learned to heal in other ways

I think self-defeating behaviors are
Something like that

Though we know
They sabotage our efforts to get
The things we want, we continue
To practice them because they keep
Us in a comfortable and known area
Where familiarity soothes our fear
Of stepping into the unknown

Yes, that’s it

And thus, being aware
Of a self-defeating behavior
Does not equal healing

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