Self-Defeat

I had a small conversation

With a friend yesterday and she was

Trying to explain to me that once

You’re aware of a self-defeating behavior

In yourself then you’re cured of it

I, of course, had an opinion about it

She was saying that once you’re aware

Of the behavior then you can choose

To continue to practice it or not

So in other words the behavior is 

No longer an automatic response

Instead it now requires consciousness,
Choice, and desire to practice

And I agree that all of this can hold true but there’s

A missing link that I’m trying to resolve

It’s almost like the person who is addicted

To food and cannot stop eating though

They’re 300lbs overweight, and chronically ill

Food is used to soothe something in the person’s

Psychology that he hasn’t learned to heal in other ways

I think self-defeating behaviors are

Something like that

Though we know

They sabotage our efforts to get

The things we want, we continue

To practice them because they keep

Us in a comfortable and known area

Where familiarity soothes our fear

Of stepping into the unknown

Yes, that’s it

And thus, being aware

Of a self-defeating behavior

Does not equal healing